Monday, September 14, 2009

welcome cycle 23... the witch...


It is getting to that point if I don't record what cycle I am on... I forget. Sad that there are so many cycles to account for that I cannot even remember how long it has been. I originally started this blog attempting to think positive (I hear that helps) and being thankful for the little things. I had no idea how difficult that really is.

Jeff and I went to a harvest festival this past weekend. Can I just say I caught myself staring at young children, babies and pregnant women with a little envy and jealousy ALL.DAY.LONG. Ok... a lot of envy and jealousy. I gotta work on that. I do not know their stories. Maybe they have struggled too and this is their miraculous end to their journey. Or it could be they just stand down wind of their partner and they get another kid. Either way, pregnancy agreed with most of them and I was jealous. I wanted to know how it felt. I wanted to touch their bellies and feel the life move inside them. I want to be able to experience it... and my patience is running thin.

It is our 2nd wedding anniversary coming up next week and I so wanted our gift to be a successful month. My Saturday morning greeted me with raging cramps and the expected end to a cycle. I guess we will have to settle for a nice dinner instead. I look forward to my support group meeting tonight to get me some positive perspective... and then next Monday, we will have our appointment with the RE to commit to our next step in the process.

In the meantime, I will think of a good thing I am thankful for post...

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