This weekend I was told by my aunt (who is currently battling bone cancer) that it would not be the end of the world if we could not have a baby and that there are worse things that could happen. She also asked us if we looked into adoption since fertility treatment is so expensive.
I know she is just trying to help us gain perspective and I appreciate it. It truly helps to see that things are not so terrible. My mind knows the truth-that it will happen if it is meant to happen. But my heart is not so easily convinced. My heart is screaming for the chance to have the experience, feel the life grow inside me... and nurture that soul. My heart simply cannot understand.
This is the first of your blog posts I have read, so it may seem weird that I'm commenting out of the blue, but I felt like I wanted to let you know that I know how you feel! People are always saying, "Well, you can adopt!" or "You're still young!" or whatever. However, as someone in the process of adopting our 2 year old foster child, I can tell you that adopting does not make your desire for a biological child go away. I still, like you, long for the feeling of life growing inside me, to see my husband hold a brand new baby that we created together, to see my son be a big brother...all those things.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, all this to say that I know where you're coming from, and you're not alone! Blessings!
Thanks Krystal... it really does help to know there are people who know EXACTLY how we feel in this situation. It is impossible to expect, unless they have been through it, that others can understand the scope of what is happening. Thanks so much for your comment. It is nice to know my thought are shared with others!
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